Ever been rudely serenaded by a car whose muffler sounds like it’s auditioning for a heavy metal band? Well, chances are, the driver behind that noise nuisance might be a certified “psycho.” Yup, you heard it right! Dr. Julie Aitken Schermer from Western University got curious about what kind of person thinks, “Hey, let’s make my car louder than a rock concert.” So, she did what any sane person would do: she conducted personality tests on over 500 young folks, mostly dudes, to get to the bottom of this vehicular vendetta.

She found, “Loud Cars, Big Egos: How Being a Dude, a Dash of Psychopathy, and a Pinch of Sadism Predict Your Need for a Roaring Ride.” Sounds like a blockbuster, doesn’t it? In her own words, Dr. Schermer unveiled that it’s the thrill-seeking psychos who are more likely to pimp their ride with ear-splitting mufflers. Apparently, they’re the type who’d rather watch folks jump out of their skin than bother with, you know, muffling their mufflers.

These muffler-modifying maniacs aren’t just satisfied with scaring pedestrians. Nope, they also harbor a deep affection for their four-wheeled beasts. They stroke their steering wheels like they’re petting a golden retriever!

Now, before you start thinking every car enthusiast is a certified lunatic, Dr. Schermer wants to make it clear: not all loud car lovers are psychopathic fire-starters. However, she drops a bombshell by revealing that the personality profile of muffler meddlers is eerily similar to those who have a penchant for playing with matches (legally or illegally, we don’t judge).

But hey, let’s not forget about those dudes who think the trunk of their car is the perfect spot for a bass speaker the size of a mini-fridge. Is there a term for double trouble? If not, we might as well coin it now: “psycho-squared.” And you can bet your turn signal that these double psychos are also the ones who think indicating a turn is for wimps!!